REPLY
Review two peer Portfolios. Specifically address the following areas of your peers’ posts:
- Style and Tone: Is the tone appropriate? Who do you think the audience is, based on the tone?
- Content: Does the content provide enough information to get a feel for the individual?
- Grammar and Mechanics: Is the content easy to read? Is it error free?
- Feedback: What suggestions do you have for peer to strengthen the portfolio pages?
1rst post: KUMI KORI
I feel that Edward Liu’s portfolio was outstanding. In his introduction page, he arranged a few sentences in each part, so it was easier for readers to understand what he wanted to tell them. Also, he showed a few pictures, which were related to the sentences, in each part, so they were very useful for him to appeal his achievement or his characteristics to the readers. Also, one more portfolio, hospitality management’s portfolio, was very outstanding for me. In the poerfolio, there were a lot of vivid images in the first page. It looked enjoylable, and it made the readers to want to see the other pages. In addition, the arrangement of the pictures looked very considerable. I would like to imitate Edward’s portfolio, which was easy for the readers to read it. To improve my portfolio, I have to arrnage what I want to tell the readers with a few sentences in each part.
Introduction:
I currently attend in Finance major of Webber International University. In there, I am studying investment, corporate finance, or bank financial management. Except for finance, I studied business ethics, management, marketing, and accounting. I also have an experience of an accounting assistant as an internship in a Japanese accountant office. My professional goal is to become a certified accountant in my country. Therefore, I am studying for its license. I will begin to work as an accountant assitant for a few years, and after getiing the license, I will worl as an accountant. I will graduate from the university in May, so I am planning to begin my career this year.
Professional Philosophy:
My working philosophy statement is that the result is the most important in the job. I have a few experiences to get this philosophy during my lifetime. First, since I was a child, I was an abacus competition player. Abacus is a traditional Japanese calculator, and players compete with the speed that they can exactly calculate within the decided time. I had a lot of rivals in the competitions. Also, I was always very nervous and did not good performance in the competitions even if I practiced very hard. However, in the competitions, the result is all, so nobody made importance on how hard the players practiced. It was very natural. We had to show how hard we practiced as our results in the competitions. All of the players practiced hard. I felt that it was meaningless for me to reflect the practice to my good results.
The second experience happened after I entered the university. I knew that my English skill was not enough to understand any classes in the university, so I tried to improve my English skill by communicating others. During the time, I sometimes did not get the good grade due to my lack of skill. I rewrote the same assignment again and again, or fixed my essay a few times. Even if I did it, my grade was sometimes still bad. It was a natural, because the teachers evaluated my level by reviewing my assignments. The process was not important. I had to reflect my efforts to my submission.
In working place, it is the same. I have to reflect my effort to succeed my job with my result. It means that if we succeed in our job, the process is free. However, I know that if I succeed in my job, I have to make an effort in the process, because my skill is not enough to succeed it without doing anything. Therefore, to increase the possibility, which I will succeed in my job in the near future, I have to improve my various skills, which probably will be needed in my job, such as professional writing skill, English communication skills, summarizing skills, or exact grammar or sentence structure skills.
2nd POST: Aundraya durante
Part 1: The Portfolios that stood out to me were the Nursing and Health Sciences. The Nursing Portfolio has very clear wording and I understand her philosophy and I have a clear knowledge on why she chose nursing and why she’s passionate about it. The Health Sciences Portfolio stood out to me because his website made me interested in reading it and all his pictures stood out and caught my attention, his word choice is great and simple for the reader to understand why he enjoys his career and why he decided to choose this path. The Accounting Portfolio did not stand out to me because it was plain compared to the others and there weren’t any pictures to express his career. It was not a Portfolio that I would enjoy or have interest in reading. I would like to imitate the Nursing Portfolio even if it’s not in my career field. I can make my Portfolio better by putting more pictures more about my field than outside the field. And giving examples how I ended up choosing this field, and choosing better word choices and style.
Part 2
1. Introduction: My name is Aundraya Duarte. I’m from Boston Massachusetts, but I live in Orlando Florida. I am Sophomore at Keiser University studying Sports Medicine to become an Athletic Trainer. Before I came to college, I never knew I would love sports medicine as much as I do. I am experiencing alot of new things about health and the body in this field. After I graduate for my Bachelor’s degree, I plan to attend college again to get my a Master’s degree for business. I eventually want to start an Athletic Training business once I have a successful start after my Bachelor’s. When I was younger I grew up playing basketball and hoping I go to college for it and go pro. But things changed after I got injured and did not play for the rest of my Senior year and I lost hope in playing. I choice Sports Medicine because I love health and learning about the body, and I also love sports. I still wanted to feel connected to the sport and enjoy doing my job at the same time. I want to help players with their injuries and get them back into shape. This is a major that I’m passionate about and my goal is to become very successful and have a business in this field.
2. Athletic Training Philosophy: Athletic Training makes sure to improve your injuries through the prevention, the treatment, diagnosis, and it’s the rehabilitation for athletes. I believe that this field helps with communication and responsibility. This career goals are to care for others no matter the gender, sports, or fitness work. As a trainer you should always want your clients to trust you and feel comfortable around you because the work you plan on doing with their injury. It takes alot of work and dedication because you are working with others and making sure they prevent injuring themselves again. The best athletic trainer is a role model in this field.
